The Assoholics 12 Steps (from the archives)

  1. We admitted our addictive need to demonstrate our belief that most other people are idiots and deserve to be told so or treated rudely for the offense, and recognized its consequences in our lives.
  2. Came to believe that a power other than self could restore us to wholeness.
  3. Made a decision to go for refuge to this other power as we understood it.
  4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
  5. Admitted to ourselves and another human being the exact moral nature of our past.
  6. Became entirely ready to work at transforming ourselves.
  7. With the assistance of others and our own firm resolve, we transformed unskillful aspects of ourselves and cultivated positive ones.
  8. Made a list of a couple stupid people we had harmed.
  9. Made direct amends to such people where possible, knowing full well that they probably wouldn’t understand that it was all their fault to begin with, except when to do so would injure them or others. In addition, made a conscientious effort to forgive all those who harmed us after we pointed out their stupidity in an effort to help them, selflessly.
  10. Continue to maintain awareness of our actions and motives, and when we acted unskillfully promptly admitted it (to ourselves and then forgive ourselves).
  11. Engaged through the practice of meditation to improve our conscious contact with our true selves, and seeking that beyond self. Also used prayer as a means to cultivate positive attitudes and states of mind. And make a concius effort to hang with stupid people and increase the likelihood that we would reveal their true nature to then in our capacity as a social mirror.
  12. Having gained spiritual insight as a result of these steps, we practice these principles in all areas of our lives, and make this message available to others in need of recovery…. and also for stupid people to see that we really are trying to help and not just to make them feel inferior.
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